Barney Fife -Andy Griffith Show Quotes

Barney Fife - Zen Master Quotes

Fife, Barney Fife--Bachelor, Deputy, and Zen Master????

I have heard people describe Officer Barney Fife as a neurotic, a nervous Nellie, a jitterbug even!   But those who have judge Officer Fife in this manner simply have not truly listened to the deep words of wisdom and calmness that come out of his mouth.   For if you dissect Fife’s quotes, you will see that he is a true Zen Master!

*Zen is doing one thing at a time.  All your energy is focused on the current task only!  Master Barney realizes this as is evident in the following quote:

“If you ride with your mouth open in the wind and put your tongue against the roof of your mouth, its impossible to pronounce a word that begins with the letter 's'“

*A Zen Master remains peaceful at all times.  They do not believe in anxiety.  If stress starts to come upon them, they just……

Nip it. Nip it in the bud. - Barney Fife

*Zen Masters are one with Nature.  You are the sun, the trees, the bird soaring to be free of jinxes:  

“Fly away buzzard, fly away crow, way down south where the winds don’t blow. Rub your nose and give two winks and save us from this awful jinx.”  Zen Master Barney Fife 

*A Zen Master will fully concentrate on every day task or routine - no matter what that might be:

“ Oh, I don't know... I could go up to the pickle factory. They always need a brine tester.”

*A Zen Master knows to just go with the flow of the Universe.  Even if the Universe happens to have a whim:

Zen Master Fife: [Barney trying to keep Andy from going home to dress for dinner]
Well, it's a whim. Are you going to question a whim? You question a whim and you take the fun right out of it! 

Sheriff Andy Taylor Quote: Well, would it kill the whim if I just take a shower and put on some clean socks and underwear? 

Deputy ZM Fife: Sure it will! It's not a whim anymore if you put on clean underwear! 

Sheriff Andy Taylor: I don't understand it. But I guess a fellow shouldn't question when he's getting a free supper.

Zen Master Barney: That's right! Don't look a gift horse in the mouth. Can you let me have $5?   (For a new meditation mat, we assume...)

Only concentrate on one thing at a time--The Way Of The Zen

*In the  practice of Zen one reduces, shortens, condenses everything. Stick to the basic truths and rules: 

“Now here at "The Rock" we have two basic rules. Memorize them so that you can say them in your sleep. The first rule is... Obey all rules. Secondly, do not write on the walls, as it takes a lot of work to erase writing off of walls.” -Zen Master Barn

*Zen Masters do not concern themselves with material possessions, the latest trends or fashion.  He does not have a closet full of clothes.  What he has, he has! Just the basics:

“What`s the matter, haven`t you ever seen a man take off a dress before?”- ZM Fife 

*A Zen Master is cognizant that anxiety is like a prison and…..

“Boys, when that steel door slams shut, that`s the end of the happy days. No more fishin`, no more ball playin`, no more peanut butter sandwiches.” -Deputy Master Barney Fife Quote

*The Art of Zen is about being grounded as well as being in tuned with the laws of nature:  As is unmistakably clear in one of our favorite Zen Master’s quotes:  

“A dog can't get struck by lightning. You know why? Because he's, he's too close to the ground.  See, lightning strikes tall things. Now, now if they was giraffes out there in that field, well then we'd be in trouble.”

*Zen Masters have great characters: are humble and rarely troubled or thin-skinned.  

 If there’s anything that upsets me, it’s having people say I’m sensitive. -Master Barn

Ultimate proof that Officer, Deputy Barney Fife is a Zen Master

Zen Master Barney knows that we cannot know

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May you be as relaxed and enlightened as our friend, Deputy Barney Fife, Zen Master!!!

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